Get Rid of Your Fear with Janet Schlarbaum

Janet Schlarbaum on Aug 16th 2009

How To Get Rid of Your Fear of Public Speaking

Get Rid of Your Fear with Janet Schlarbaum By: Morty Lefkoe

If you’ve had an intense fear of public speaking for many years and have tried a variety of ways to rid yourself of the fear – without success, you’ve probably concluded that you’ll probably never get rid of the fear. Or, if you do, it will take a lot of time, effort, and reinforcement.

If you’ve used most conventional methods to get rid of your fear, you’re probably right. The Lefkoe Method (TLM) is not one of the conventional methods. In fact, TLM is the only technique that has been scientifically proven to totally eliminate the fear of public speaking. As Lee Sechrest, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the University of Arizona, concluded after conducting a rigorous scientific study with 36 people who had a severe fear of public speaking, “The Lefkoe Method was effective
in virtually eliminating the fear of public speaking.”

How does TLM work and how can you use it to eliminate your fear? About twenty-one years ago I developed the first in a series of interventions that literally do produce rapid and permanent change. The most important one, the Lefkoe Belief Process (LBP), eliminates the beliefs that are the primary cause our behavioral and emotional patterns.

After helping hundreds of people with a fear of public speaking totally eradicate that fear, we discovered that there are only a few beliefs that cause the fear.

Mistakes and failure are bad.
If I make a mistake or fail I’ll be rejected.
What I have to say is not important.
People aren’t interested in what I have to say.
I’m not capable.
I’m not competent.
I’m not important.
I’m not good enough.
What makes me important or good enough is having people like me or think well of me.
Change is difficult (or takes a long time, or needs reinforcement, etc.)
Inherent in public speaking is at least some fear.

When all these beliefs are eliminated and a little bit of de-conditioning occurs, the fear is gone–permanently. Let me show you how the LBP works for one of these beliefs.

David, one of my clients, complained of significant fear whenever he had to speak in front of a group. His palms got sweaty, his heart pounded in his chest, and he had a hard time focusing on what he wanted to say. One belief he had formed that contributed to this pattern was Mistakes and failure are bad. Intellectually he knew that learning from mistakes was a good thing, but deep down he felt this statement was the truth for him and, in fact, making mistakes upset him.

When I asked David what happened early in his life that led him to that conclusion, he replied: “Dad and mom got annoyed with me whenever I didn’t do what they wanted, when they wanted. They’d say things like: ‘Can’t you ever do anything right?’ and ‘How many times do I have to tell you?’.”

After telling David that his belief was, in fact, a valid child’s interpretation of his parents’ behavior, I asked him for a few additional interpretations of what his parents did and said. In other words, what else could their behavior and statements mean other than the meaning he gave it as a child?

His answers included: My parents thought mistakes and failure were bad, but they were wrong. My parents didn’t get angry because I made a mistake or failed; they got angry because I didn’t do what they wanted, when they wanted. The way my parents reacted had little to do with what I had done; it was a function of poor parenting skills; a couple of parenting courses and they might have treated me very differently.

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3 Janet Schlarbaum Ways

Janet Schlarbaum on Jul 23rd 2009

3 Ways to Improve Public Speaking Skills

Janet Schlarbaum Speaking Skills By Ronnie Taggy

First of all, if you want to be an effective public speaker and improve your public speaking skills, you must get over your irrational fear of giving speeches and talking to large groups of people. Some people lose sleep for weeks before giving a speech, while others shake violently while they are speaking. This is a unnecessary evil and it can be dealt with easily with a little motivation, inspiration and perspective. Just like with anything else in life, you need training. You didn’t just KNOW how to use a toilet…you were trained! I know it sounds silly, but it’s true.

Also, it is important that you can stand behind any statement, statistic, argument or point that you put out there and back it up with reliable evidence or citation. If you can’t back up your arguments, the audience will lose interest fast and you will not be respected. Try to be more general in your speech, some people are easily offended and you really want things to go nice and smooth so tickle everyone’s fancy.

Don’t start talking about your beliefs about God or who should be th next president. Stick to your topic and if you are going to use humor, which is always a good thing…make sure it’s on topic! Nothing is worse than telling a bad joke that is off subject and losing everyone’s attention, trust me.

Finally, you want to grab your audience’s attention within the first couple paragraphs of your speech or presentation. Provide a really powerful headline or a shocking statistic (that you can back up of course). This will always snag your listeners attention and keep them waiting for more. It’s a time tested technique and you can use it to improve your public speaking skills dramatically. Once you have the confidence of knowing people WANT to hear what you have to say, it’s all uphill from there!

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Janet Schlarbaum Public Speaking

Janet Schlarbaum on Jul 9th 2009

Public Speaking – Practical Tips to Get Started and Develop Self Confidence

Janet Schlarbaum Public Speaking By Edward Hope

The rewards of being a confident speaker are great. You will be recognised as being of leader material. You can achieve more through 5 minutes of effective speaking than 5 years of grind. A few well chosen words on the subject under discussion will receive favourable attention and command respect.

Getting started in any field of endeavour is often the most difficult part. The tips given here outline an approach to getting started in public speaking that have proved successful in developing self confidence in speaking either in public or in conversation.

Your First Appearance

Your first appearance in public need only brief. No more than a few words is all that is required, e.g. stating your name and occupation. If you are tempted to fidget or wring your hands, clasp your hands behind your back.

You can still be a hit with your audience by acknowledging the fact that you are new to public speaking. Just avoid using the clichéd “unaccustomed as I am to public speaking.” Instead say something like “This is my first appearance before an audience and I am very nervous. My name is …… and my business is ………, and some day I hope to tell you more. Then sit down.

Practice Fields

To find somewhere to practice will require a little initiative. When practicing swimming you will need to find a swimming pool and when practicing public speaking you need to find a meeting. Fortunately there are thousands of meetings held every day that will give an ambitious speaker ample opportunity to be heard. Also there are two organisations that are great places to help you to become more confident speaker. They are Toastmasters International and the Dale Carnegie Institute.

Persistence

A little and often is the key to building confidence and improving your performance. A brief speech delivered often is more effective than a longer speech given infrequently. More than any other human activity confident speaking is learned by doing and improved by practice.

Preparation

Thorough preparation is of key importance. Self confidence will develop as a result of full preparation for your speech. With a full understanding of your topic you will radiate confidence.

Overcoming Stage Fright

Unfortunately there is no silver bullet to over the normal human anxiety of nervousness before speaking. There are techniques that can help with this such as – positive mental attitude, visualising success and deep breathing etc. In the end it comes down to exercising a little courage to make the decision to start and then stepping out and doing it. Your first appearance will open a bud of confidence that with proper care and attention, you can flower into being an effective confident speaker.

It is worth noting when making your initial appearances in public – that a part time speaker that knowing their subject fully and having something worthwhile to communicate can outshine the seasoned professional from the audience’s viewpoint.

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Janet Schlarbaum Speaking And Entertaining

Janet Schlarbaum on Jul 6th 2009

Overcoming Nerves – In Public Speaking And Entertaining

Janet Schlarbaum Speaking And Entertaining By Johnnie Gentle

Many people often assume that those of us who stand up to perform or take part in any form of public speaking are not troubled by nerves and that their own attempts would only be doomed to failure because of their feelings of nervousness and fear.

These thoughts only exacerbate the feelings. When they do attempt to speak, their mouth goes dry, the hands begin to sweat, the stomach churns and a feeling of nausea takes over. Very often they begin to tremble and the brain seems to stop working.

In this confused state they just ‘freeze’ and yet another negative experience is added to their memory banks, with the certain declaration of – “Never Again”.

First of all, we need to understand why we feel this nervousness. Let’s face it, – we know we can speak; we’ve rehearsed and practiced well, the family thought the act or the tricks were great, or the speech was amusing, so there’s really nothing to be afraid of there.

We’ve checked our ‘flies’, – so nothing to worry about in that respect. If you have prepared what you want to say and rehearsed your act well, then you should be ‘home and dry’ and it should be a breeze. I can assure you, if you have done the preparation, it will be a breeze, but you will still feel nervous.

During my entertaining days I suffered badly from nervousness prior to going on stage. As a matter of fact I still do to this day. My act always went down really well and I was inundated with bookings and re-bookings, so my confidence was always high. However, the nerves were always a nightmare prior to starting my act and I could never understand why.

An old experienced entertainer once told me that all good performers, whether in show business or sports performance or even academic or business performers, – feel nerves to varying degrees, and usually the higher standard of performance, – the greater the feeling of nerves and apprehension.

He explained that it’s not the fear of not being able to perform, or of forgetting your lines, (or in the case of the sportsman, of not being able to run the race), it is actually the fear of not quite living up to your own high standards.

You see the good, conscientious performer sets his sights and standards as high as he possibly can, and so even as he improves, he keeps pushing his standards that little bit higher. You can therefore see why he will never free himself of these feelings of nerves and apprehension. It’s simply a concern that you will not live up to your own high standards.

So how do we overcome nerves? – Well, you don’t. You simply learn to understand and nurture them as your friends and your guides, which help to ensure a really high standard of performance.

You could of course lower your sights, but this would surely lead to lowering your performance and eventually no performance at all. Yet, this is what most people do. They lower the standard of their performance, taking on only the easy stuff, the things they are confident they can do.

However, lowering the standard of your performance is not the way. It may just help decrease nerves, but it will eventually kill your performance completely. You see, when speakers or entertainers get a bad reception or “die”, as we say, they very often never perform again. “Finished!”

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Improve Your Janet Schlarbaum Speaking Skills

Janet Schlarbaum on Jul 6th 2009

Secrets on How to Improve Your Public Speaking Skills

Improve Your Janet Schlarbaum Speaking Skills By Zach Keyer

It is True… for some, it is spiders; for many, ghosts; and others would say heights, but there are those who actually admit that public speaking is their greatest fear.

It is actually commonplace. Come to think of it, there can sometimes be nothing more frightening than having to stand up and speak in front of a group of people who could very likely shout at you, laugh at you, or leave while you are in the middle of talking. Even actress Debra Messing of the hit show Will and Grace surprisingly had this fear all her life. And she is a professional actress! Imagine how much worse this could be for those who have not even had the chance to go up on a stage at all in their lives.

Thankfully, public speaking is a fear that can easily be overcome. If you are not exactly paralyzed by fear, but you think you still have room for improvement on it, then you are realizing the fundamental truth that is facing us all. You can improve your public speaking skills quite easily by following the beginning tips mentioned below.

Remember to be prepared and get your practice. The value of preparation can never be overemphasized. It adds confidence and substance to your speeches and presentations. Research the topic you will talk about and try to find the best way to present it (angle-wise). Outline your major points and use cue cards if necessary/available. Practice your speech-delivery to make sure that your talk will not exceed the time allotted for you, and so that you could also asses your delivery from your own perspective. If you are to be the lead-speaker in a very important engagement, try to practice your speech in front of someone who could properly assess how you have done… and is able to provide honest feedback to you.

Also, Know your audience… technically, this is still part of being prepared. However, it is just so important that it calls for a separate mention. Knowing your audience provides you with valuable insight on the angle and perspective of presentation that would appeal best to them. It guides whether you can be casual and funny or whether you would be better served to be serious and analytical. It also gives you great input in streamlining your speech by suggesting what you need to include and what you can do without.

Also critical is to dress the part. As much as we refuse to admit it, image can sometimes be everything. How the audience responds to you can highly depend upon how they perceptually perceive you. Generally, you would appear as a more convincing speaker if you are dressed as business casual or business formal. Also, since the audience will have to look at you anyway, you might as well make your appearance a pleasant one for them.

Keeping the KISS in mind. Keep It Short and Simple. Even geniuses have limited attention spans… no special talent for the A.D.D. afflicted needed at all. Do not bore your audience to death with a speech that is too long. The faster you can get your message across, the better. A short and simple message also appears smarter while preventing you from being perceived as someone who came unprepared and is fumbling through their presentation. It also allows your listeners to retain what you have said easily. Including the opportunity for you to perform valauble rephrasing of your concepts – for added comprehension by your audience.

In addition to these quick tips, your public speaking skills will also be improved if you practice establishing periodic or constant eye contact with your audience. Also, if the occasion and your resources will permit, you can use visual aids such as slide presentations, handouts, product samples, etc to stimulate your audiences attention. To finish off your presentation, you should plan to answer the audiences question confidently and with a caring and informative attitude.

Improve Your Janet Schlarbaum Speaking Skills

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The Guaranteed Janet Schlarbaum Cure

Janet Schlarbaum on Jun 25th 2009

The Guaranteed Cure for Severe Public Speaking Anxiety

Guaranteed Janet Schlarbaum Cure By Al Gammate

Public speaking is the most prevalent fear, I heard. And I believe it, because my acquaintances have this fear. However, people do not have the fear to the extent that I had. There were times where I, completely freezing at a scheduled speech, could not perform at all. But usually before this happens, I attempt to cancel the scheduled speech or not show up.

My public speaking fear began in the ninth grade of middle school. I vividly remember the turning point. I spent days preparing for a history class speech. As I sat in the history class, ready to give my speech, a friend seated next to me began teasing me. He laughed, “You look nervous.” “Are you sweating?” “You will hyperventilate while giving your speech.” “Don’t stutter and shake while standing in front of the class.” The teasing continued for some time, since others were scheduled to speak before me.

Then the teacher called my name; I walked to the front of the class. I looked at the audience, spotting my friend who was teasing me. He eyed me, smiling. Fear coldly filled me. My hands frozen, I began to breathe rapidly, concentrating difficultly. Speaking quickly, I stuttered, stumbled, and sometimes paralyzed. Time slowed; I torturously concluded my speech. The sympathetic audience did not ask me any questions during my speech conclusion. I returned to my seat in the back of the class-defeated.

Before this incident, I easily gave speeches, giving them well. But after this incident, my public speaking fear was born. I am sure that my friend who teased me never intended for this to happen. He probably thought his teasing was good-natured.

Throughout high school, I difficultly and poorly gave speeches. After every failed speech, my confidence waned. When I entered college, speeches petrified me. So whenever I enrolled in a course requiring me to give a speech, I quickly dropped the course and added a course without this requirement. By the time I graduated from college, dropped and added courses riddled my transcript.

Afterwards, I entered graduate school. I was in trouble; almost every course required me to give speeches. This panicked me. I performed poorly on the scheduled speeches that I attended. I did not attend many of them. Whenever I gave a speech, the audience gazed downwardly, attempting to ease the situation. After some time in graduate school, the mere thought of giving a speech terrorized me. My grades suffered. However, I eventually graduated.

Following graduate school, I entered the workforce. My job required me to regularly give speeches to large audiences. Unaware of this requirement, I accepted the job offer. Public speaking situations followed me wherever I went. I had to find the solution-fast. So during my spare time, I read articles and books on public speaking fear. Reading, I found the following:

1. Strong feelings of specific situations are produced by mentally connecting the feelings and situations together. For example, you, strongly fearing driving, fearfully experienced car accidents or fearfully heard about someone who experienced them. So whenever you drive a car, you fear. If you fear enough, you avoid driving. The same is true for fear and public speaking.

2. Some people are born with sensitive sympathetic nervous systems. The sympathetic nervous system protects you from danger. For example, you, being chased by a wolf pack, run more energetically; because your sympathetic nervous system released large adrenaline amounts into your blood stream. This adrenaline also causes you to breathe rapidly, sweat, quiver, and shake. However, some people’s sympathetic nervous systems are easily triggered, triggered by even safe events. These people overreact to events.

3. Some people are born with brains wired for worry, fear, depression, frustration, or agitation. Brains wired this way have low levels of a calming chemical naturally produced in the brain. This chemical is called Serotonin. Serotonin calms the brain, producing feelings of relaxation and well-being. Also people born with normal brains, thinking negatively, lower their Serotonin levels. Therefore negative thinking, genetics, or both contribute to low Serotonin levels.

4. People diffident in giving speeches, being unprepared, fail at giving speeches. The better prepared you are, the more confident you are.

5. A person regularly facing a specific fear loses the specific fear.

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Phobia from Janet Schlarbaum

Janet Schlarbaum on Jun 24th 2009

Getting Over Your Public Speaking Phobia

Phobia from Janet Schlarbaum By Ronnie Taggy

Millions and millions of people suffer from an overwhelming public speaking phobia. This particular phobia can be crippling. People lose their appetite, they can’t sleep and they have anxiety at the mere thought of the fact that they might actually have to give a speech. Whether it is for work, school, fund raising, etc.

If you know your topic and have solid points to make, you will do just fine. My mother always used to tell me to imagine that everybody in the audience was in their underwear while you were giving a speech. This would make you feel superior to them and almost want to laugh…but instead, it makes you comfortable. It might not work for everyone, but hey, it works for me.

If someone told you that in two weeks, you are going to have to give a karate demonstration in front of hundreds of people. The only problem is…you DON’T know karate! Well, obviously nobody would attempt to give a karate demonstration without knowing one lick of the martial art.

So with that said, why would anyone want to attempt giving a speech if they have no idea HOW to do it properly?

Getting over your public speaking phobia is one thing. Learning how to work the crowd and keep peoples’ interest is the next. However, they go hand in hand. One would not be as effective without the other, agreed? See how I have made several good points in this article? If you do the same in your speech, people will respect you. They will want to listen to what you have to say and before you know it your speech will be over and done with. Don’t let your fears be in control of you and your emotions.

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Janet Schlarbaum Improvement

Janet Schlarbaum on May 30th 2009

Improve Your Public Speaking Skills

Janet Schlarbaum Improvement By Tanner Larsson

Public speaking is simply the act of getting up in front of people and talking about a subject. As easy as it may seem, there are important skills that are required in order to keep the audience’s attention while not straying too far from the topic at hand. Developing these skills is vital to becoming a good public speaker.

When speaking in public, it is important not to be afraid of making mistakes. Worrying about forgetting a line or not following a prewritten speech will only make you more nervous from the get go and make it more likely that you will indeed make a mistake. Making mistakes is human and understandable to the audience creating a sense of empathy. It is important to make a natural recovery from mistakes and not get down on yourself for “screwing up.”

Good public speakers usually always use humor in their presentations. Telling jokes can often be good way of “breaking the ice” with the audience. However, if joke telling is not your forte then it is best to avoid doing so. Humor can be used subtly and a willingness to poke fun at yourself makes you appear more human to the audience. Storytelling can be a useful tool for a public speaker. By relating information from the presentation to your own life, you make your topic feel more real and more applicable to everyday living.

A skillful use of the public speaking environment is quite important as well. It is important not to seem rigid when giving a presentation. You should use the space that is available and move around a bit to make you seem more comfortable with what you are speaking about. In confined spaces, public speakers should use more body language.

An appropriate use of notes is also essential when speaking in public. It is important not to read during your presentation and to only use notes as an outline and as a last resort in case you forget some information. Also, visual aids should be used to liven the presentation and in turn make it flow better.

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Janet Schlarbaum About Fear

Janet Schlarbaum on Mar 24th 2009

Win over the Fear of Public Speaking

Janet Schlarbaum About Fear By Vincent Stevenson

Fear of public speaking surrounds us. Ask anybody how they felt that first time they had to speak in public. Perhaps it was in a presentation at work, delivering a eulogy for a friend or family member, or even worse, the dreaded best-man speech. Don’t worry, it’s perfectly natural.

The fear of public speaking is the most serious phobia known to man. In a recent survey, 90% of people said that they would rather die than stand up and make a speech in front of their family, friends and colleagues. This is a serious problem. But how have we come about this crazy statistic?

It’s easy. Who wants to make a fool on themselves. I know that when I was a child, I was of terrified visiting my aunties and uncles’ houses at the weekend, because we were expected to perform a ‘party piece’, a two minute tortuous entertainment. A song, a monologue or a little dance would do the trick.

Real fear was not performing the ‘party piece’. This is all tied up with the fear of public humiliation. As if the moment of humiliation isn’t bad enough, there’s always people close to you who can drop it into the conversation, anytime, anyplace, anywhere.

As children at home, we were always told to be quiet. Similarly, at school, shut up, be quiet, go away if you want to talk! My grandfather had a rather unpleasant saying, “If you can’t improve on the silence, then shut up!”

As a child, it was rather difficult to know how to improve on the silence, I found it all terribly confusing. But surely this was what granddad wanted, a quiet life with no interruptions from children who knew, well, nothing.

It’s not surprising that we feel less than confident when we stand up and actually want to communicate something serious. This is hardly supportive conditioning for our careers, is it?

Do any of these scenarios strike a chord with you? An amazingly high percentage of people feel exactly the same way. You’ll be glad to know that help is just an email away. If you live in the United States you’ll find a number of speakers clubs in your locality and they belong to an organisation called Toastmasters International.

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Using Janet Schlarbaum Humor In Public Speaking

Janet Schlarbaum on Feb 25th 2009

Using Janet Schlarbaum Humor By Rickie Smith

Humor in public speaking is the most widely used tools when giving your target audience something to take with them. Remember, this is the whole point of public speaking. Whether you give them something entertaining or persuasive, you will want your audience members to be able to say that they learned something or that they haven’t wasted their time listening to you. Even if you provide them with just some new and interesting facts you will You will find that it can be difficult to break through and audience. Therefore you will want to rely on the use your emotions to convince them that they are getting something worthwhile out of the time that they are giving to you.

Using humor in public speaking will allow you to change the mood of the people in the room while making them feel more comfortable. Of course you will not only want to make sure that your humor is appropriate, but you will also want to learn whether to actually to use it in your speech or for demonstration purposes. Everyone has their own way of dealing with public speaking, but you will find that humor will go along way when it comes to informing, persuading, or entertaining your audience. Yes, you might have something serious to say, however, this doesn’t mean that you have to be serious. You can use the humor to help everyone get and feel somewhat relaxed about a serious matter.

Humor and laughter, much like music, is something that is understood by the general population. Just be sure that you do everything you can to make your audience feel more comfortable. Give a lot of thought to the type of humor that you plan on using. The type of humor you choose must fit perfectly into your speech, otherwise you will most certainly lose your audience’s attention.

You may consider the use of humility. In these cases, this is where you try to bond with the audience by telling a funny story about yourself. There are various to introduce humor into the speech, but you must find that the time will always feel right. You will want to make sure that all the stories you tell are appropriate and that your personal shortcomings are something that you added to the speech in an effort to make your entire audience feel better.

In addition, you may want to combine a little bit of humor and humility so that you can not only bond with the audience but also really get and keep their attention. Be sure that everything that you plan in your speech is tasteful. Using humor in public speaking combined with all of your knowledge and experience on a certain subject will allow everyone to take away something from it and remember it.

Here are a few simple Tips to follow for using humor in public speaking:

1. Know your audience and be extremely careful not to offend anyone with the use of your humor

2. Involve your audience in your speech.

3. Tune in to several TV shows and watch how experienced public speakers using timing with their humor.

4. Go to the library and check out several books on public speaking jokes so as to not “reinvent the wheel”.

5. Make sure the humor is relevant to the subject matter.

Janet Schlarbaum Public Speaking

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